Sometimes, you just want the party to keep going…and you’ll do anything to make that happen. Well, one British guy took that to the extreme. In this viral story, a tourist fakes his own abduction so he can keep partying in what’s been described as a “seedy sex hotspot.”
Look, I understand wanting to keep the partying going. However, I believe this is taking things way too far.
Tourist Fakes Abduction To Keep Partying In ‘Seedy Sex Hotspot’
According to the Daily Star, a British tourist allegedly faked his own abduction to extort money from his family! Clearly, we’re dealing with a real gentleman here. Thai Police even say he had his buddies beat him up so the whole thing was more believable.
Daily Star reports that Ian Robbie Day, from Portsmouth, came up with the plan to fake his kidnapping after he ran out of money and wanted to keep living it up on his vacation in the famous sex tourist destination of Pattaya, Thailand.
This is such a bad decision all around. Daily Star says officers started searching for him after his family was sent graphic pictures of Ian beaten and bruised. However, after investigating law enforcement officials found that he was actually busy partying, and was not abducted.
His motive has already been discovered. According to Daily Star, Police Lieutenant Colonel Sorasak Saengcha said, “When his family wouldn’t support him anymore, he staged the kidnap, that was the reason he did that. He asked his family to send money and they said no.”
Daily Star says that police had started a special operations team to rescue him before he was allegedly found partying. He was eventually found and arrested on several charges. Ian and three others were arrested on charges of jointly possessing unauthorized firearms and ammunition, possession of category one drugs, and overstaying in Thailand, per Daily Star. Overstaying can be a crime? Well, you learn something new everyday. If only I could charge visitors at my house.
6 Songs To Immediately End The Party According To Lisa Way
It is no secret that Lisa Way has a party past. Her occasional stories have become a thing of legend on the show!
As difficult as it is to believe now, she even once owned her own karaoke machine. Our Lisa of today, however, still enjoys a gathering, but she has her limits. And, if the party happened to be taking place at her house, she has we way to let everybody know that it’s time to go.
6 Songs To Immediately End The Party According To Lisa Way
Throughout the history of Dave & Chuck The Freak, Lisa has made several references to certain songs that she will put on at her parties in an effort to make her guests want to leave on their own.
I think we’ve all been there. It’s getting late, you’re getting tired, and the party is not dying down. What do you do? You could join in! Get your sleep another time. Additionally, you could turn off the music and tell everyone to “go home!” However, that won’t make you the most popular friend at the party. They will certainly be talking about you afterwards. You can’t do that. It’s not an option.
What you can do? Pretend to go along with it, while secretly sabotaging your own party. That’s right, it requires some self-sabotage. You get an awful playlist going that will make them want to leave. It’s the perfect idea. Can’t you just see Lisa executing this at a party? It’s a brilliant plan.
Right here, right now, for the first time ever, Lisa is revealing some of her go to party ending songs! Would any of these make you want to bail on a party? Check out the list of party ending songs below! Hopefully, you’ll stick around until the end. We don’t want the songs to be so bad that even the list makes you want to go home!
Kenny G - "Songbird"
Wow. If this song comes on during the party, it’s definitely time to grab your coat. The party is over. There’s nothing left to see here. Great pick by Lisa.
Beach Boys - "Barbara Ann"
No matter which version you prefer, this should get the job done. Nobody will want to stick around much longer once this starts playing. It’s a shame because The Beach Boys have many songs that would be great for parties. However, not this one!
Chicago - "You're The Inspiration"
Just because there are some people at a party in the music video doesn’t mean your party is going to dig the song. Somehow, guests in the video didn’t leave immediately. Hopefully, things will go differently for you. Personally, I’m getting out of there if I hear this. I guess the same goes for pretty much any Chicago song, actually.
4 Non Blondes - "What's Up?"
If all goes right, your guests will be asking, “what’s going on?” when 4 Non Blondes come on. Sure, it’s a great road trip song. Maybe a good pick for the girls. However, the party in general does not want to hear this. It will upset them and they will leave. Just as you planned.
Simon And Garfunkel - "The Sound Of Silence"
There are many different versions of this song out there. None of them should be played at a party. That is…unless you want your guests to leave. Which we do! So, play it loud and proud! Maybe even play it twice in case anyone misses any part of the song. Yup, that will do the trick.
Crash Test Dummies - "Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm"
Oh, man. This would hurt to hear at a party. Actually, it could be dangerous how fast they all start running for the door. You’re going to want to make sure you’re somewhere safe and secure. They are going to leave, and they are going to leave aggressively. It will be like your home is Walmart on Black Friday. Only instead of trying to enter, they’re racing to leave.
Cort Freeman was born and raised in Metro Detroit. He was named Clarkston High School 2009 Class Clown 13 years after graduating. Totally normal thing to happen. That’s thanks to his time spent as an Intern at Comedy Central and Social Media Correspondent for The Colbert Report. Cort has done comedy across the country, both standing up and sitting down. When he’s not trying to make you laugh on-air and online, he’s probably at home enjoying his favorite shows like Seinfeld, South Park, and The Office. He’s also totally uncomfortable writing about himself in the third person. Cort enjoys writing about comedy, food, sports, and entertainment. So, basically anything and everything.
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