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Dave and Chuck the Freak

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A guy in Kentucky who was pleasuring himself at a park last week told the cops it was because a GROUNDHOG had startled him, so his pants fell down.  They didn’t buy it and he was arrested for sexual abuse.

FULL STORY

Blame it on the groundhog: Man accused of public masturbation says he was 'startled' by critter

A man reportedly on the sex offender registry accused of public masturbation in a park blames the whole thing on a groundhog. An unidentified victim told police Thursday evening that a man was following her and another individual around a park, watching them playing, with his pants down and privates exposed.